DMG ICE -Viral Speak-

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Viral Speak 01-10-2001

Contemplation Cyanide
(PAW 2001)
Sadness is a thing of beauty.
Beauty that poisons the soul in a subtle way.
Love is a thing of beauty.
Beauty that lights the coldest wick, and burns the last bridges.
Together, when mixed, they form the most lethal combination of Fire and Poison.
Of Passion and Malice, this side of Hell.
-Philip Wesley-

Mario Tennis on the 15......so if you aren't in a horny-like state of anticipation there's something very wrong. Because soon you'll be able to engage in euphoric, game playing bliss as Mario and friends hit their fuzzy green balls around! - Tenryuujin

Philip: Buy it from out store! YEAH!

Y'know... the old Snowflake looked a lot better... - John M

Philip: I'm working on it.

Curse this new browser! Whenever I try to send a long message, it glitches! It's been evilicated! And I have the second scene for Charzilla all ready to weird people out with...
Anyway, last I checked, Snowflake Studios was only #13 at Keenspace. That's not enough! Vote more times, everyone! The world will learn it cannot escape DMG Ice! MWAHAAHAAHAA...
Darn. Too much sugar again... - NeoVid

Philip: Now we are #12. It's kinda sad that the #1 is a half-baked Adventurers clone.. Adventurers is better. Damn.. I'm starting to sound like one of those Keenspot people.. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! I'm turning into Eight! Could be worse... I could end up like Illiad...

Mwaa ha haa!!!! Snowflake is like an expanding gelatinous mold! It keeps growing and growing!!! Nothing can stop it! Protect the women! - Clay Jones

Philip: And the best part? I have more comics up my sleeve.. Robin has a great comic I will show.. and I got this really interestingly umm.. simple one called Mouth and Fox Dog. There *will* be new B&W's World.. and I got AT Freak Backlogs.. ALBOS, DMG Files, and the eventual.. AT FREAKS YOU 2001. Everyone is gonna like that...

I really want SongPro. Why do they keep delaying? Do you think "they" should wait to tell us about a product/game until 6 mo. or less before the release? I kind of wish they would. Give us enough time to start thinking about something and whet our appetite, but not so much time that we start to feel frustrated with waiting. - pikamom

Philip: I know.. the delays are bad.. I pre-ordered one almost a year and a half ago.
hey phil,

I am curious about your image at the top of the site. What happens if a new person to the site thinks the name of this website is "magi nation"? hmm that would be bad!
Just curious. - dark terran

Philip: O__O

I haven't said anything lately because I was in Hawaii eating Kuplaberries and catching Arokuumon. - SuperSmashBlu

Philip: Sweet.

I just love reading the reviews at DMG Ice! Today at the mall I saw Faceball in the used bin for $14.99, and I snatched it up (remembering the admonitions I heard here). So when I got home I popped on over here to see the reviews again and confirm my decision, and got caught up in reading not only about Faceball, but about Final Fantasy
Adventure. Makes me want to play it all over again! - pikamom

Philip: Oh, you can now buy games from us (and GameStop!) too. ^_^ I'm glad you like the reviews. Our readers who have contributed reveiws should take a bow for their fine work. They truly rock.

who's slack monkey?

*Blink* - Jumbo

Philip: The evolved form of Sock Monkey.

Magi-Nation's monster graphics? Boss
Magi-Nation's character graphics? Passible
Magi-Nation's backgrounds? Uninspiried
Magi-Nation's storyline? Been there, done that
Or am I just a jaded gamer? - Orochi p_fish

Philip: I would say you've gotten jaded. I like the graphics, the world's are HUGE, the game battle engine isn't as cliche as you would think. The storyline starts similar to Secret of Evermore; but that's good. I thought Secret of Evermore wasn't given a fair chance. I also think that a negative attitude toward games makes for future EGM editors and IGN reviewers. I'll just come out and say it... I barely respect Mark Nix's opinions. I disagree with Craig on a regular basis on some games. I think that when a reviewer first starts reviewing.. they review out of a passion... not a clinical study. That makes their reviews BETTER. I don't think people want a "This game sucks; because it has only two players and not four. It's graphics aren't up to whatever Rare/Square pulled out of their pants today, and etc.) They want to know.. is it fun, will I like it. Will my children like it. Example.. I like Diablo 2. But to kill enemies, you mindlessly click on your mouse rapidly.. especially with close weapons. That is *technically* a horrible thing. The game should get bad reviews for that. BUT, damn it, the game is lots of fun and that's what matters. It's a lot simpler than just technical bits. Robopon is fun. It's essentially a watered down version of Pokemon with robots. By technical standards.. it's a 0%. But I like it. I find it amusing on a lot of small levels. You see.. I'm the guy who runs RPG characters along the walls, rapidly pressing the button and I found some nice hidden depth and humourous text in the game I like. I like it. I "shouldn't" but I do. I liked Lil' Monster's battle engine better than the one in Pokemon. The "Dowser" move is the coolest. Also, Lil' Monster got the mood bit with their monsters correct. Pokemon Gold and Silver made it extremely vague to gauge your monster's feelings. Those types of things. A developer goes into a game *usually* to make something special. They try really hard and I think some ounce of respect should be granted by a reviewer in actually PLAYING the game and checking out anything that they LIKE about it. A lot of reviewers and consumers look for what they DON'T like about a game. I think that's bad. Example, it's really easy to get your butt kicked in Cannon Fodder. I could whine about that.. or I can embrace it as challenge. I thought of it as challenge; because the game is fun. I loved the challenge in R-Type DX.. it got frustrating.. but I got over that. Majora's Mask.. the time thing.. a lot of people didn't like the time bit. I thought it was brilliant.. because it made the reward of beating an area that much more fun. I think a lot of people go in to a review to bash it.. I'm guilty of doing that too. I'll move along now..

Rei-ohoki vs. a Gundam
Meow......*Stomp* - Kamakaze

Philip: YAY! Hey! Ryoko.. let go of me! Akemi won't like that!!!!!

You may call me Murray. I am a powerful demonic force. I am the harbinger of your doom, and the forces of darkness will applaud me as I STR...uh...ROLL through the gates of hell carrying your head on a pike!!!!.....Well? Why aren't you screaming in terror?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! - Murray the Talking Skull

Philip: I'm imagining Football...

What do you think are the odds of Earthworm Jim 1 and/or 2 being ported to the GBA? Those games rocked...here's hoping the GBA versions don't suck... - Monkey, Agent of G.L.O.B.A.L.

Philip: Wanna know a secret? A lot of companies are doing SNES ports instead of original liscenses for the GBA.

No! Harry Potter must not be in Playstation game! Very bad things happen to Harry Potter if Harry Potter in Playstation game! Har... oops, Dobby forget Harry Potter dissed Playstation. Dobby very stupid! *smashes his head against an Acme-esque anvil* - Dobby

Philip: Harry in a Play Station game.. that's horrible.. I mean.. seriously.. Play Station is made by Mud Bloods. (Yeah, I've read all four books...) Catch this sock!

Philip, does Blaster Master: Enemy Below grace your fare collection of gameboy games? If so, do you know how to beat the hoard of clams that make up the level 5 boss? I can't find this out anywhere online.... - Nitro

Philip: Yeah, I have that one.. I love it.. but I can't remember that bosses secret.. umm. what's your passcode? I'll see if I can figure it out.

Got X-Box? - Billy

Philip: I got a TON of Viral Speak things on that thing. Here's my opinion on it.
X-BOX = An Anvil that can play games. You can use it to press shirts, save the world, and barbeque shrimp. It also has the same line-up as the PS2. Is Microsoft Evil? Well.. when I get one.. I'm gonna try and install Linux on it. Because what could be more fun than.. "lnx4xb0x"? I like the fact that DVD play is seperate. The system will then be cheaper.

well, phil. It looks as though i'm gonna have to start hitting the weights big time. That way I'll be able to lift the x-box into my car if i decide to get one. - Beefy_B

Philip: I think Bill must have some type of complex. "My console is bigger and heavier than yours."

But AIPOM COOKIES WERE YUMMY! WAAAAAAAAH! You never let us have any fun! - Anonymous Psycho

Philip: Here! I'll throw you some yummy..... OGLOPS! Mmm.. Oglopy.

The McRib has returned - The Boinker

Philip: YAY! What I hate though.. is that it goes away in the States.. in Europe.. McRib is there on the menu.. ALL THE TIME.

NOOOO!! DONT EAT MY GIRLFRIEND!!! - Vertigo1

Philip: BWA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

I JUST BOUGHT AN OCARINA AT THAT SONGBIRD OCARINAS PLACE FOR MY MAJORAS MASK AND IT SOUNDS VERY NICE(ONE DAY SCARY SHORT PEOPLE CALLED GRYBLES WILL KILL YOU IF YOU DONT HAVE ONE SO BUY ONE ) ALSO COULD YOU PLEASE PRINT THIS IN BLUE? THANKS. - unammusing local guy

Philip: HA HA HA! I did! in very LIGHT Blue... bwa ha ha!

Meowthar: It seems to me that nobody has sent me any fanmail for ALBoS... Does nobody like it? Well, maybe after Releena makes her debut...
Releena: HURRY UP ALREADY! DRAW THE FREEKING COMICS! MY PUBLIC AWAITS!
Meowthar: I'm waiting for Philip to get the archives done!
Eliot: (sitting at the cash register) I'm not getting any fanmail, either.... Something is not right... - Meowthar

Philip: EAT MEOWTHAR! BWA HA HA Okay.. I'll stop that..

Vektorlogic confirmed that they will rerelease the neo geo pocket color this spring and develope and translate software. So, we'll see. - fonebone

Philip: You know.. if Vektorlogic pulls it off.. they will have the thanks of Akemi and I for giving that system a second chance. AND I'll be able to get Falsei..

This is serious. (I can already tell that this page doesn't understand that word, and I've only been here four times. ^_^)My Fanfic, Pokémon Adventure, was listed on the Pallet Gym Fanfic list as 'Iced'. I can't find it anywhere. What up with dat? - Pikamew Triggara

Philip: Hmm.. I'll check the bits of fan fiction I did get.. the fics are a total mess.. the transition didn't exactly go smoothly at all. And for the guy who wants me to reply to the thing with Sibling Rivalry.. I'm working on it. Three months without a new chapter really sucks.. I know.. I'm having trouble with the formating on that fan fiction and layout. It's like getting a batch of movie reels without the script and having to put them in it.. pieces are here and there.. and everywhere. I'm working on it. Delays and waiting happen. I know you're going to roll your eyes or something like that about it.. but I'm giving her all she's got Captain.. and eventually I'll get it up to Warp Speed.

Translucence: Interior Design Fad or Spawn of Satan?
Recently, a big design theme in everything from computers to plastic dishes to clocks has been fruity, plastic translucence. It's actually become quite popular, prompting millions to decorate their homes and computer towers with these colorful accentuations. One might ask how such a thing might become so popular. I am such a person. How can such ugly items be so popular? And is this some evil plot cooked up by Stalin himself? Let's see!
Just by looking at these translucent items, one can easily see the innards of phones, computer monitors, and even the tables beneath them. However, not all of what lies beneath is legible. No, it's cloudy and disfigured, tainted with cloudiness. It is my belief that this cloudiness symbolizes the half-truths of things like Communism and Mission to Mars. They say that they're great ideas, and on the outside, they look very desirable. But in truth, they are evil, EVIL!
Let's take Communism as our first example. It's a great-looking system that puts all on an equal playing field, guaranteeing the same level of happiness, success, and prosperity for all. Beneath that shroud of lies is corruption, embezzlement, and an economy falling to its knees. Translucence, similarly, looks bright and beautiful on the outside, but underneath lies the blood and sweat of poor, starving children who were
fired from Nike sweat shops and want only to buy their families food.

Now is that something you want in your house?
iMacs are also translucent. They say that they allow users to create digital masterpieces out of the home movies that they already have. The operating system promises to be both usable and user-friendly. Both of these are lies! The home movies bit is just blatantly preying upon the weakest of our society, the computer-illiterate. In that commercial, the part about having to take the movies with a digital video camera is just mumbled, and those more likely to buy one of these translucent evils just assume that they can email their movies to friends and relatives with the greatest of ease. Not true, and once again, a LIE! The operating system has a nice exterior with smiling faces abound, just like the computer's translucent shell. But in truth, it's an unusable, impractical, and not user-friendly pile of horse doodoo!
Who could have created such an evil, you ask? I've compiled a list of possible translucence creators that you will find below.
1. Sony
2. Marx
3. Lenin
4. Stalin
5. Steve Jobbs (Apple exec)
6. Satan
7. The PS2 itself
If that's not proof enough for you, then just wait until your pink, translucent bedpan jumps up and suffocates you. Then you'll wish you had listened. Or wait until that green, see-through alarm clock stops working because of its poor worksmanship and you're late to work. Then you'll be fired, forced from you home and in fact from this country, and forced to manufacture the very alarm clocks which ruined your life. Then you'll be sorry, won't you?

There should be a reader editorial section on DMG Ice. Then we could speak our minds about anything and everything. :)

Philip: I have a Translucent Purple Game Boy.

A friend of mine gave me her phone # and I told her to call me 'cause I would forget. I told her I woule either pitch the # or eat it. She said I wouldn't eat it, I called her bluff. *Burp* (This is a true story) - Slim Shady

Philip: I can not decide if that is funny or pathetic...

Phillip, now that Nintendorks has re-opened, Brandon has continued rejecting my DRCs. I am sad, but then I remember you always post mine. You make me feel so accepted! In fact,I have a small request for you. If I promise to write everyday, can I be a regular? I've never been a regular anywhere before! It would make me HAPPY! - Admiral Tailz

Philip: Sure. I can even pretend to be Brandon. ^_^ Umm.. Punos. I mean.. Ponis... gah.. my NDork meter is empty!

Wobbuffet owns you. - Hunter

Philip: Is Wobbuffet your momma?

hey, remember when you hit your head with the garage door? That was funny, to me at least. - Beefy_B

Philip: Actually, the garage door fell off it's hinges and fell backwards on top of me. I was closing it and it slid off the rails it was on and fell on top of me. I got a concussion from that. It's not as funny as the time that those people did that thing over there. That was a riot. But it was like the Puppy, who had become a dog.. although the Industry.. that was a Revolution.