BACK TO THE INDEX.
"Restoration 3: 100 Signs of Game Boy Obsession."
-By Philip Wesley-
-Originally part of the main site back in 1998.-
-Please read the foreword.-
All I can say is that this is almost embarrassing to look at. It also
comes off as ironic. My old nickname was "The Avardancer" and it was
essentially a demon name based off of the book The Screwtape Letters.
The idea was that it was a play on the word avarice. The following list
is full of spelling errors and even a numbering error. But I still love
it. A lot of these may go over some people's heads. To help out, here
are a few hints: Blood Lust Software made NESticle, the first good NES
emulator. The creator of the Game Boy died when he stepped out of his
car after a car accident and was mowed down in a hit and run. There are
also references to Japan only products, as well as old advertisement
slogans. Please enjoy it!
By The Avardancer (1998)100. There are currently more than three Gameboys hiding in your room.
99. You have reported people who use emulators to the police.
98. You can name all 151 Pokemon Creatures....
96. You can name all 103 enemies, traps, and boss creatures in Legend of Zelda: "Link's Awakening".
95. You knew that there 103 different enemies, traps, and boss creatures in Legend of Zelda: "Link's Awakening".
94. You bought a Game.com just so that you could point and laugh at it.
93. You own four copies of Faceball 2000, Yoshi's Cookie, Super R.C. Pro Am, and/or F-1 Race.
92. You paid a theatre manager to let you see "Titanic" in Black and White.
91. You printed out multiple copies of Nintendo's "Color Gameboy Press Release" and pray to it every night.
90. You imported a "Gameboy Lite".
89. You have the complete collection of "Gameboy" comics from Valiant.
88. You get all bleary eyed when you hear someone say "Power in the palm of your hand."
87. You crack up laughing when you hear someone say "Power in the palm of your hand."
86. You have this website bookmarked more than three times.
85. You own a Workboy attachment for your Gameboy.
84. You bought a Super Nintendo ONLY for the Super Gameboy.
83. You own the Gold 100th Issue Nintendo Power Special Edition Gameboy Pocket. (Lucky stiff.)
82. You have gotten into a fist fight over whether Wario Land 2 is better than Legend of Zelda: "Link's Awakening".
81. You can name all the character classes from all three Final Fantasy Legend games. (That's well over 200 classes.)
80. You only bought Secret of Mana because it was the sequel to Final Fantasy Adventure.
79. You imported a Super Famicom and a Super Gameboy 2.
78. You own all seven versions of Link's Awakening.
77. You knew that there were seven different versions of Link's Awakening.
76. You can name all seven versions. (English, German, Japanese, French, American Debugged version, American Rerelease, and Spanish.)
77. You own a Gameboy Pocket in all 17 colors.
78. You can name all 17 colors.
77. You own all 151 of the little rubber Pokemon figurines.
76. You want Pokemon more than Legend of Zelda 5.
75. Even though you can't read them; you own all five Pokemon cartridges.
74. Your highschool yearbook picture was taken with the Gameboy Camera.
73. You are currently trying to figure out a way to raise the dead.
72. You get in a car accident and you're scared to get out of the car.
71. You see someone playing a Game Gear and you mock them.
70. You think that the 64DD is a Gameboy add-on.
69. Your thumbs twitch all the time.
68. You have written nasty letters to Eidos for not making a Tomb Raider game for Gameboy.
67. Square threatens to sue you if you bug them about Final Fantasy Legend 4.
66. You are willing to pay Nintendo to bring Dragon Quest Lite over to the States.
65. You think that Game Genie and Pro Action Replay are gifts from God.
64. You think that Game Genie and Pro Action Replay are sons of Satan.
63. You have beaten all five of the Gameboy Mega Man games.
62. You can't decide which ending is worse: Final Fantasy Legend 1 or Donkey Kong Land.
61. You can beat the Gameboy Killer Instinct on very hard.
60. You girlfriend/boyfriend says they want some action and you hand them a copy of Operation C.
59. When there are four of something you call them a "Tetris". (Example: "The Petersons have a Tetris of kids.")
58. You have a fear of bricks.
57. You made a detailed map of Planet SR388.
56. You donated a Gameboy to the Salvation Army.
55. You can recite the "Link's Awakening Rap" perfectly.
54. You noticed one day that Wario looks disturbingly similar to Snidely Whiplash.
53. You noticed one day that Wario looks disturbingly similar to Dr. Wiley.
52. You noticed one day that Wario looks disturbingly similar to anyone.
51. You're completely convinced that Fortified Zone is somehow part of the Metal Gear Series.
50. You liked Final Fantasy Legend 2 better than Final Fantasy 6.
49. You make a stack of your Gameboy games and it's over a foot high.
48. Without the plastic cases.
47. You have an Ice Blue Gameboy tattooed to your butt.
46. You truly believe that Operation C takes place after Contra 3: The Alien Wars.
45. You dream of Sonia Belmont.
44. You dream of Samus Aran.
43. You truly wish from the bottom of your soul that Gameboy was completely water-proof.
42. You bought a computer with internet capability solely for downloading Gameboy Roms.
41. Kid Icarus: "Of Myths and Monsters" brings tears of joy to your life.
40. You registered your copy of Virtual Gameboy, or GB97.
39. You know that the NoCa$h emulator sucks.
38. Blood Lust Software has asked you to stop harrasing them about a Gameboy emulator.
37. You're still angry at me for not posting roms.
36. You own at least three "unlicensed" games.
35. You devised a way to play your old NES games on Gameboy.
34. You want a rumble pack-type accessory for Gameboy.
35. You've programmed your own Gameboy games.
34. You've proposed to someone useing your specially programmed Gameboy game.
33. He/she said "No".
32. He/she said "Yes".
31. You believe that the world is frozen.
30. You started an animal rights group to "Save the Goombas!"
29. You introduce yourself as Theo from Riccar.
28. You have a Quake/Quake 2 clan that looks like King Dedede.
27. You believe that Tatanga is the greatest villian ever made.
26. You name your daughter "Marin".
25. You jumped into the Missouri river on hopes of entering the "Catfish's Maw".
24. Chickens everywhere know your name.
23. The lack of a Gameboy platform game starring Yoshi has made you cry yourself to sleep on many occasions.
22. You have developed a new respect for Owls.
21. You firmly believe that the best things in life are tiny.
20. You constantly hear the "Chill" theme from Dr. Mario in the back of your mind.
19. The only reason you're reading this is to take notes.
18. You can relate to this list.
17. You've argued to your parents that playing "Tetris" is educational.
16. You now have ZERO libido.
15. You still have the box your old Gameboy came in.
14. You believe that Mint Leaves make you fly.
13. You tried to ride on top of your hamster.
12. You named your gold fish Manbo. (Or Kine.)
11. You own the "Barcode Battler Gameboy Pack."
10. You started a petition to Nintendo to release Gameboy music on CD.
9. You find it hard to believe that Gameboy only has an 8-bit CPU.
8. You disconnected the Battery Light in your Gameboy to make the batteries last longer.
7. You bought two Gameboy Pockets and combined the caseings to make them two toned.
6. You flunked Advanced History 101 because of Wario Land 2.
5. You can make a list like this.
4. You think that the cat at the beginning of Final Fantasy Adventure looks like Garfield.
3. Someone asks you if you'll buy a color Gameboy and you reply: "You mean that Gameboy was Black and White all this time?"
2. Your vision is now 13/560.
1. You ask someone: "What's N64?"
-Philip Wesley 2006-
-Sora is a trademark of SquareEnix and no endorsement of DMG Ice.com or SquareEnix by either company is meant or implied.-
-Property of dmgice.com-