Battletoads
Game by Rare / Tradewest
Reviewed by chromie
bkerr@umich.edu
Size: unknown
Save: Nope.
Released: 1991
Works with: Any Game Boy

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Opening Snide Remarks: Battletoads impressed us all when it was a new game.
Battletoads was beautiful. Battletoads was the prettiest game ever. Battle-
toads rocked the videogaming world.

Unfortunately, I tried to play Battletoads for the Nintendo some time ago,
and I realized that, after the graphics were no longer impressive, the game
isn't that much fun, either.

Battletoads for the Game Boy, unfortunately, has that very problem.

It is very similar to Battletoads, however, it's only the Battletoads name,
and not jaw-dropping color and big sprites, that's selling it this time.

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Gameplay Description: Battletoads is a side-scrolling Golden-Axeish arcade
game. Run around, jump, beat evil non-toad anthropomorphic creatures into
the ground. Problem #1: That's not very much fun to do.

There are different sorts of levels intertwined with the side-scrolling
levels--those of you who recall the original Battletoads will remember with
gnashing of teeth the bike / jet / whatever levels, which happened so
quickly that you had to simply memorize the layout and order of all the
obstacles. Problem #2: These levels are even less fun to do.

This is a near-perfect port of the style of gameplay found in Battletoads.

Liked: Trademarked goofy Battletoads humor.

Hated: Playing the game.

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Graphics Description: The graphics are pretty good. Crisp, detailed, easy
to make sense of, and utterly uninspiring. All of the details, and none of
the generally jaw-dropping awe, of the original title are kept here.

Liked: Never confusing.

Hated: Battletoads doesn't work well in black and white.

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Sound/Music Description: The audio is easily the most forgettable part of
this game. Not good or bad, it's simply there. You won't turn it off simply
because you won't really listen to it to begin with.

Liked: Earthy thwak! and pow! sorts of noises.

Hated: Hearing them billions of times.

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Play Control/Game Design: The play control is a tough cookie. It seems that
the designers decided that allowing the player to control what's going on
would be a detriment to the game. As a result, beating any standard enemy
consists of simply (1) not being hit by it and (2) smacking the attack
button until it dies.

Your Battletoad will do all the dirty work by himself. That's kind of
disappointing.

The mini-game type levels are nothing to write home about. Although it's
easy enough to control them, they're simple too fast, especially on an
original Game Boy, where everything becomes a blurry, dead Battletoad-shaped
mess.

Liked: ...at least the framerate is constant and it doesn't flicker.

Hated: Everything else.

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Improve: Look, I love Battletoads as much as the next guy. It's my duty as a
male, larval yuppie video game enthusiast. But this game sucks.

The best way to improve this game, in my mind, would be to time-travel to
late 1990, and transfer the development funds for this title to the creation
of a sequel to Fortress of Fear.

RIYL: Double Dragon, Battle Arena Toshinden.

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Final Words: Don't buy this. If it's given to you, play it once, and then
consider it an opportunity to explore the innards of a Game Boy cartridge.

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Score
Gameplay: *
Graphics: **
Sound/Music: **
Play Control/Game Design: -
Personal Opinion: *
Total: 6 out of 25


Final Score: 24%

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Currently Known Codes: 

At the title screen, press A+B for a harder game.