Let it fly!
Of course you love this.

Why pretend press releases are news when you can pretend they are articles.
Yeah. This stuff is kinda bad.
Enjoy it!
The Daily Newsity 05/17/2013
"The Direct Cut Wounds"

Today, Nintendo had a "Nintendo Direct" presentation that
yielded very little fruit for the Nintendo 3DS fan. If you want a quick synopsis of what was announced, there is a press release about it up in The Library. The big news was Nintendo and Sega announcing that the next Sonic title would be Nintendo exclusive for the Wii U and the 3DS. While exclusive Sonic games are not unheard of on Nintendo consoles, it appears that this might be the first of three exclusive Sonic the Hedgehog titles. Nintendo and Sega then announced that they would finally start putting more Game Gear games on the 3DS Virtual Console and if they failed to do so, they will kill Peter Moore as a ritual sacrifice. Considering that Peter Moore works for Electronic Arts now, I think that they might be serious. The list of games is in the press release and appears to add a robust line up to the wafer-like North American 3DS Virtual Console. Also on the Virtual Console: The Legend of Zelda: Oracle of Ages and Oracle of Seasons at a slightly discounted price. Check that press release for more details! If you are on a tablet, just hold your fingers on the link and an option to open it into a new tab should appear. Please touch this website a lot and in a wide variety of places! One thing I forgot to mention before is the announcement that Capcom would be releasing Phoenix Wright Ace Attorney 5: Dual Destinies only in the eShop. This has caused a lot of Digital Download Drama amongst a lot of the faithful followers of Capcom's creative courtroom chaos.

Nintendo also released
a new puzzle panel for Animal Crossing. If you are going to the Pokemon Hour on Saturday the 18th, please bring your 3DS and your pink pieces. We do not mean anything sexual in that statement at all. We just want to swap pink pieces all night long; because I just need those pink pieces to fill a few holes in the big picture. Speaking of the big picture, Sony announced Panopticon for the PS Vita with further details to arrive about it at a later date and the mystery is pretty great looking. We also released a brand new Radio DMG and we would appreciate it if everyone were very excited about it. It features Legacy Action Comics and they will also be at Denver Comic Con 2013. Let us know, via our many social network tentacles, if you want us to do another interview with the Legacy Action Comics team. We will see you and your pink pieces again soon!Philip Andrew Wesley

The Daily Newsity 05/16/2013
"Welcome Back!"
This seems very familiar and it should be.
Once upon a time, we updated repeatedly with little snarky paragraphs describing the news and each of those was full of links. Well, this is one of the next steps in our evolution. Now, let us get down to the newsity! Tomorrow is a brand new Nintendo Direct that will focus on the Nintendo Wii U (whatever that is) and the Nintendo 3DS. As for site updates? An episode of Radio DMG will land tomorrow after the Nintendo Direct and will address that. Also, it will contain an interview we did with Legacy Action Comics from Animeland Wasabi. These upcoming weeks will be pretty packed with delicious contents! We have SANA coverage and we will have some more sweet Denver Comic Con 2013 coverage soon. I already put up the picture link so we are completely prepared! Why not click it and drool over last years pictures while anticipating the pictures, video, and audio from this year! If you keep track of The Philip Rational, then you know we have an article up about SANA. The third issue will be up after we see what strategy Nintendo takes for the Summer. Since today is Thursday, the eShop updated, we updated the Flick'r page with screenshots, and the Download Guide updated. The big downloads to look out for are The Starship Damrey, Mega Man 5, Harvest Moon GBC, and then there is Super Metroid for all twelve Wii U owners. If you're a Vita owner, check out the reviews section below for a review of "Thomas Was Alone."

For those of our fans who love Pokemon, check this game out! Sorry. I mean this game? These games? Oh, here it is. Learn to love Drinky Fletchling. Fletchling is awesome. If you want to confess your love for Drinky Fletchling, please check out the MAY POKEMON HOUR! It is this weekend. Also this weekend? Sadness and bitter disappointment. Probably.
Catch everyone next time!Philip Andrew Wesley

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